....Is what I do, what I've always done & how I will always be! By default not by choice, it's something I've sometimes dubbed my 'Gift & Curse'. Trust, at times I wish my mind came with an off switch but..don't we all?
In my mind, I believe everything has some scientific, theoretical, psychological or simply reasonable explanation behind it, behind every word spoken, every move made, every outcome, obstacle, victory & heartbreak..the universe has conspired in some witty yet spiritual way for it happen as is, for an evident reason, & 9 times out of 10 - a reason we have yet to discover. & I always try my best to understand the reason at the present at hand.
I swear I have an obsession with needing to gain perspective & trying to narrow the age-old gap between the sexes & science. Especially in the worst of times!
In my mind, I believe everything has some scientific, theoretical, psychological or simply reasonable explanation behind it, behind every word spoken, every move made, every outcome, obstacle, victory & heartbreak..the universe has conspired in some witty yet spiritual way for it happen as is, for an evident reason, & 9 times out of 10 - a reason we have yet to discover. & I always try my best to understand the reason at the present at hand.
I swear I have an obsession with needing to gain perspective & trying to narrow the age-old gap between the sexes & science. Especially in the worst of times!
In other words: When I'm Stuck In The Road Smoke Coming Out The Hood, A True Damsel In Distress...I Need Answers. Not A Fabricated Truth To Block My Riverbank Of Tears Flowing, But INSIGHT & Honesty To Pick Me Up Out Of My Rut. Now The Odds Of The Situation At Hand Being The Same One To Put Us Back In A State Of Bliss...Are Slim To None, Unless You're Talking Fantasy & I Only Deal With Reality.
Though It Is Inevitable That Our Pain Will One Day Be The Reason For Our Joy, Who Will Mend The Wound When It's Fresh? OURSELVES. One Of The Greatest Gifts From Pain Is The Process Of Self Reflection, The 'Who What Where & How' We Got To That Space..You Kind Of Retrace Your Tracks & See What Went Wrong. We Have To Digg Deep Inside Ourselves As A Person & Search For Truth. Because Let's Face It - When Emotions Come Into Play, They Blurr That 3rd Eye & Pacify Intuition As A Woman, Welcome To Limbo!! - That Ugly State Of Confusion Where All Seems Nothing More Than Smoke & Mirrors. I'm JussSayin' Me, As An Individual, When I'm Feeling Lost - I Search For Knowledge For Clarity & Strength. Because The Absence Of Clarity Is The Reason For Our Vulnerability. Women Need Closure & Answers, Or The 'What If' Will Forever Hang Over Our Head.
The Answer Lies In Your Heart Of Hearts Ladies: Just Never Lose Your Voice Of Reason, Your Standards & Your Knowledge Of Self-Worth; When You Regain That Strength You So Easily Eased For A Potential Mate, That's All The Clarity You'll Ever Need In The World. You Know, That 'I'm THAT Bitch!' Feeling *inner Beyonce*
For Instance: You Know Your Most Recent Addition To Male Disappointment? Remember That 1st Little Unpleasant Funny Feeling In Your Gut When Something Slightly Turned You Off Or Didn't Make The Most Of Sense? Yeah, That Was Signal 1 Of The Many More Red Flags That Were Short The Follow. Ultimately, You Stuck Around..& Limbo Was Your Last Stop On That Bus Ride.
We As Women By Nature Always Want To See The Good In Everything, I've Always Questioned Why Is The Woman Always 1st To Crack? Always 1st To Let Down Her Guard & Warm Her Heart Up To Easily & Quickly To A Man, A Man Who In Most Cases Hasn't Showed Her What She Deserves. Because It's Usually The Tired Ole Tale Of The Woman Being Involved With A Prick *excuse me!* Who Treat Every Woman The Same & She Fell Victim To Wanting To 'Show Him Not All Women Are The Same & She's Different' & Believe That If We Stay, Be Passive, Give Numerous Chances..He'll Realize He's Got A Good Woman. WRRRRRRONGG! He'll Realize He Has Found Someone To Place In The Comfort Zone, That Female He Knows He Can Do No Wrong To & No Matter How Bad He Is At Fault - He Knows Tomorrow Night He Can Call You & You'll Still Be In The Wing Willing To Give Some PoonaniMuffin. That My Followers, Is A Fool, & A Fool Is Nothing Good.
If You Possess True Strength, You Wouldn't Feel The Need To Show & Prove To A Soul Because That's A Sign Of Weakness & Insecurity, Young Jeezy Ain't Never Lied!! "LET MY SWAG DO THE TALKIN I DONT SAY TOO MUCH!". Had You Kept Your Strength Intact & 'You Can't Tell Me Nothin'' Appeal, It Would've Been A Challenge & What Man Doesn't Looove A Challenge? Not A War of Ego, But Enough Sweet & Sour To Leave Him At War With His OWN Ego. At Some Point He'll Know What You Stand For, What You Don't & Take Notes- At This Point If You've Been Seeing Him Long Enough For Him To Have An Idea Of This, You Know He's A Prospect. Men Look For Traits In Women That Remind Them Of Home, Mom, & That Is STRENGTH, RESPECT & INDEPENDENCY.
...Remember, Play Or Be Played - Prey Or Be Preyed! It's Just A Game Until We Both Let Down Our Armor & Let Go Of Our Sword, & Not Everyone Is Deserving Of That :)
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